All the King’s Men
The German’s have a word, schadenfreude, it means to take enjoyment from the misfortune of others. Now, putting aside the fact that it’s extremely unnerving that the Germans came up with this word, this is the only thing you can possibly get out of this All the Kings Men. If you want to see an adaptation of a classic, albeit overrated, American novel then you’re looking in the wrong place. However, if you want to see a cast of really good actors, albeit overrated actors, fall on their faces, some literally, then this is the movie for you.
Influenced by the life of Huey P. Long, All the King’s Men is an adaptation of the Pulitzer Prize winning Robert Penn Warren novel. Willie Stark is a Louisiana politician who rails against the corruption of government. Appealing to the common man, this populist candidate gets elected, but once there he ends up being just as corrupt as those he fought against in the first place. This, of course, leads him down a road to his inevitable downfall.
The acting in All the King’s Men is something truly to behold, not so much because it’s good but because it is so bad that it boggles the mind, most notably that of Sean Penn and James Gandolfini. First of, Penn really seems to be channeling his inner Foghorn Leghorn. It’s so over the top that he might as well be running around screaming “Hey look at me! I’m acting the shit out of this thing!” As far as Gandolfini goes, well, if you’ve heard the man speak then just try and imagine him attempting to wrap his mouth around an accent generally reserved for men in white suits drinking mint juleps.
I just don’t get it, with all the people who are actually southern in Hollywood, not to mention all those who are closeted southerners, the filmmakers go out and get a couple British actors, Spicoli, and Tony Soprano? Hell, what was Charles Durning doing? Now there’s a non-southerner who could pull it off. The only person you have to give credit to is Anthony Hopkins. He absolutely refused to take on any sort of affectation. He realized how bad it would come off and just played it straight. You have to respect it.
The great thing about this film is that it shows what you get when you try and make a film for the sole purpose of winning an Academy Award. This is actually a huge pet peeve of mind. Nothing puts me off a movie more than when it’s towards the end of a year and a movie rolls out that just seems like it was put together in order to win awards. What makes me even crazier is that generally the Academy falls for it. Granted, this could have something to do with the fact that they have the average of a piece of papyrus.
Like I said, if you want to see a bunch of talented people fumble around and let their own hubris sabotage a picture, well I’ve got the movie for you. It will cost you two hours of your life that you will never get back. Your Netflix could be put to far better use.
The Grade
- Story: B
- Acting: D
- Visuals: C-
- Originality: C
- Enjoyability: D-
- Overall: D
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