-I know some of you will hate me for this but let’s all take a moment and face the facts-the real truth if you will. That truth is that Stargate: The Ark of Truth, is just like Stargate as in both have been lame for years. Stargate, at this point is like donut or greasy pizza for sci-fi fans. Come on damn you, each and every one of you know its true. The Stargate people haven’t been trying for years and its underbudgeted to make matters worse. Stargate is comfort food for sci-fi fans and its not good for you. Having money poured into the show only prevents other, better, new science-fiction from taking its place. Look, I am a fan of the show and science-fiction, but the time has come and The Ark of Truth really shouts that loud and clear. This movie was only made in order to grab the quick DVD buck and shame on you the fan, if you buy some collectors edition someday. Have some respect man!
Okay, that unpleasantness aside, if you don’t watch the show, don’t try and watch this direct to video release, what is wrong with you? If you are a fan and you’ve kept watching the show all these years later, then nothing you read in this review is going to keep you from renting, or God help us, buying this DVD. Just like a junkie has to want help…What you really need to know is that, from what I have read, they spent well over $6 million bucks on this film! Well, regardless, the Stargate crew goes toe-to-toe with the Ori again, the gang’s back together AGAIN, and Ben Browder and Claudia Black probably wake up every morning hoping that a big-budget Farscape movie will get that greenlight.
What Was Cool:
-Knowing that they are already working on another Stargate film that will be coming out soon.
-Seeing Julian Sands reduced to wearing Halloween costumes. Never cared for the guy.
What Was Stupid:
-Knowing that they are already working on another Stargate film that will be coming out soon.
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The Film's Real Genius or Geniuses:
-The real genius would be the guy or gal that came along and had some real money put into this franchise. Hear is the deal, this is a valuable commodity, with a really high name recognition, why kill it like Star Trek? Can we not learn nothing from our past people?!
Overlooked Performance/Accomplishment:
-Guy who points around the set and says “the lame computer generated creature will be sort of in this area, so your eyeline should be about here-I think.”
Story D Use of Science C Acting C- (Just dialing it in.) Portrayal of Women B Visuals-Visuals and Special Effects C+ Visuals-Set Design/Props C- Wardrobe/Costumes C- (I could make those Ori costumes.) Style/Sex Appeal C- (Let’s face it, we need some new blood on the show-I mean movie series.) Enjoyability Grade C- (Enjoyable for the unintentional laughs.) Home Theater/HD Factor C Gut Check (Level of Studio Executive Guts) D (Easy and cheap money run that exploits a loyal and desperate audience.) Overall Innovation C- (Ark of Truth doesn’t cut any new ground within the Stargate universe.) Overall Grade D+ (This is for the fans, barely.)
A Little Fact About Cherie: I use to love Stargate. Oh well.
