Reign of Fire
Here Is What You Need To Know:
Civilization has been destroyed by dragons awoken from their slumber. Our modern technology can't save us and our only hope is Christian Bale and Matthew McConaughey. There you have it, there's fire, Matthew McConaughey and evil beast, this must be hell.
What Was Cool:
-Just like most of the “science-fiction” films our buddies in Hollywood crank out for us, this film has very little science and thus relies on the visual effects to keep us coming back for more. That is not cool, but the visual effects are pretty good.
-The thick homo erotic tension between Bale and McConaughey is kind of cool if your into that sort of thing. When I saw the film it was no accident that most of the audience was comprised of gay men. But even the craziest lesbian won't go to a dragon movie hoping to pick up a date.
-Alice Krige still has some of that residual “Borg Queen” sex appeal but its fading fast.
-Matthew McConaughey playing the gruff and rough army boy Denton who shows up to save the day riding in a tank.
What Was Stupid:
-Matthew McConaughey playing the gruff and rough army boy Denton who shows up to save the day riding in a tank.
-What was very stupid was not really showing too much of the dragons wipping out civilization. That might have made for some interesting moments don't you think?
-Tiny little men fighting great big dragons.
-Christian Bale and McConaughey allowing themselves to be on screen together. Gay and gay.
-The script
The Film's Real Genius or Geniuses:
-The guy or gal who designed the poster for the film.
-Once again, the poor visual effects artist who had to make a purse out of a sow's ear (what a horrible saying).
Overlooked Performance/Accomplishment:
-The genius in the wardrobe department that understood what gay men wanted and put McConaughey in that sleeveless vest and rubbed him down with dirt.
Story C
Use of Science D
Acting C-
Portrayal of Women C-
Visuals-VFX and SFX C+
Visuals-Set Design/Props C-
Wardrobe/Costumes B-
Style/Sex Appeal B- (For gay men and straight women I guess.)
Enjoyability Grade C+
Home Theater/HD Factor B
Gut Check (Level of Studio Executive Guts) C+
Overall Innovation C-
Overall Grade C+ (More fun than baking a cake.)
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